"Where does this leave us?" I asked Nick. We asked Brit and Ricky if we could be a lone for a little while before the four of us hung out. We had walked a good distance away, but we could still see the glow of the small fire. "I think that is up to you." He answered after a pause. "My dad told me about what you asked him." I said. "He did?" Nick asked. "I didn't ask him to tell you, I-" "I know." I interrupted. "I know. I didn't know that was how you felt about me." I said, feeling my eyes tearing up. I opened them wide, and took a deep breath. I really didn't want to start crying. "I still do." He said. "What about our situation? I mean, your done with school and already working for your dad. Here. I'm still trying to get my career started. In New York." I said. "I wouldn't ask you to move back. I'd go there. I could get a job." He said. "But Nick, you love it out here. And you love working for you dad." I told him. "No. I love my job, but I do not love working for my dad. And I love it here, but not without you here with me. I just want to be with you Sammy." He said. He stopped walking, and took my hand, pulling me into him, and hugging me. The side of his face touched mine, and his cheek was wet. I couldn't hold it in anymore, and started to cry. "People don't always find this. Please don't give it up." He whispered. "We can figure something out." He said. "Nick. I don't know." I said, and took a deep breath. He hugged me tighter. "I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do. But I know you want us." He said. "No." I said, and he let go, and took a step back. I knew as soon as I said it, it was a lie. "What?" He asked. "I had to see how I felt if I told you no. But I don't believe myself. I do want this." I told him. He looked confused, and I laughed and wiped my cheek. "Yeah, I know. It sounds crazy to me too!" I told him. "Come here." He walked back and hugged me. "Let me talk to Johnny." I said, and sighed. "Really?" He asked me. "Yeah, really. Then you and I can see what we have together." I told him, and he smiled. "Now lets get back to Brit and Ricky." I told him, and started running. He ran after me, Picked me up and threw me over his shoulder. "Put me down!" I shouted. "Okay." He said, and dropped me in the sand. "Ow! Jerk!" I said, and threw sand at him. "Oh, you get it now!" He shouted, and layed down on me, pinning my arms between our boddies. he started tickling me. "STOOOOOOOP!" I shouted, laughing. "I'll stop if you kiss me." He said. "Okay!" I managed to get out between laughs. He stopped and smiled at me. He let my arms go, and I reached up and pulled his head down and kissed him. It turned into a long kiss. I don't think either one of us wanted to stop. He was the first one to pull away. "I love you." He whispered. Suddenly very serious. "I love you too." I told him. He stood up, then helped me up and we walked back to the fire and Brit and Ricky.
We all had so much fun that night! Brit and I vowed to not drift apart this time. It was really late when we all decided to head home. I said good bye to Nick, and then Brit dropped me off at home. She was going to stay over, but changed her mind. She wanted to stay with Ricky instead. I quietly walked inside and up to my room. I turned on my light and jumped. Johnny was asleep in my bed. I changed and then climbed in next to him. "Johnny." I whispered, and shook him. "huh?" He asked confused. "Oh. Hey. Where did you go?" He asked. "Why are you in my bed?" I asked him. "You said you were going to come see me tonight. I got tired of waiting, and you seemed upset earlier, so I decided to come see you instead. When you weren't here I climbed in bed to wait. I figured you were with your mom or Anna or something." He said, and yawned. "I wasn't." I told him. "Where did you go?" He asked. "I went to see Some old friends. And Nick." I told him. I decided this was the best time to talk to him. "Oh." He said. "Johnny, what we have is amazing. But what we have isn't real. I don't think we really have any connection." I told him. "None?" He asked. "Well, obviously a slight one. But I know I'm not the only one that feels this way." I told him. "Don't get me wrong. I like you. I like you a lot. But this isn't working." He looked mad. "No, it's not. I guess I just didn't want to admit it." He said. "So, this is the end of our road?" He asked. "Yeah. You don't hate me do you?" I asked him. "No. I don't. In fact I'm a little relieved." He said. "Relieved?" I asked. "Yeah. I've been talking a lot with Jaime." He said. "Okay. And?" I asked, when he paused. "I want to move out here." He said. "What?" I asked, completely shocked. "I've hit it off with Jaime real well. He's been wanting to move out of your parents for a while, and we thought it would be great for us to be roomates." He said. "Plus I really want to stay out here and compete in more tournements. I'll get a lot farther, a lot faster out here." He said. "I think that is a great idea. What about Jaime though? My dad will flip because he thinks he has no direction in his life." I said. "Stop worrying about your older brother." He said, and emphasized older. "We have some ideas for making money. Your brother has a business mind, though he hides it real well." He said. "My brother?" I asked. "Yes, your brother." He told me. "Well, I think it's great." I said. "Awesome. I'm also not going to be flying back with you." He said. "Why not?" I asked, kind of upset. "Because there is another competition the day we'd have to leave. I'm going to buy a ticket and fly back to New York in a week. I'll bring Jaime with me, so we can all hang out. Then I'm going to pack the few things I have, and fly back out here." He explained. "Okay. I'll miss having you around." I told him. "I'll miss you too. Don't be a stranger. We're still friends, aren't we?" He asked. "Yeah." I said, and smiled. There was an akward pause. "Well, I'll get to my own bed." He said, and hugged me. I watched him leave, then pulled the covers over me and shut out my light. I cried. I was going to miss Johnny. But only as a friend. I knew that. Then I thought of Nick and felt so happy. I couldn't sleep, so I picked up my phone to call him. "Hey." He answered. "Hey." I said. "I talke to Johnny." I told him. "Did you?" He asked. "Yeah. It went well." I said. "I'm glad. So now you single, yes?" He asked. "Yes, I do believe I am." I told him. "Well, I'm going to come over and sneak in, like old times. Leave your window unlocked." He said, and hung up. I laughed, and got up and opened my window for him.
Chapter Forty
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"Where does this leave us?" I asked Nick. We asked Brit and Ricky if we could be a lone for a little while before the four of us hung out. We had walked a good distance away, but we could still see the glow of the small fire.
"I think that is up to you." He answered after a pause.
"My dad told me about what you asked him." I said.
"He did?" Nick asked. "I didn't ask him to tell you, I-"
"I know." I interrupted. "I know. I didn't know that was how you felt about me." I said, feeling my eyes tearing up. I opened them wide, and took a deep breath. I really didn't want to start crying.
"I still do." He said.
"What about our situation? I mean, your done with school and already working for your dad. Here. I'm still trying to get my career started. In New York." I said.
"I wouldn't ask you to move back. I'd go there. I could get a job." He said.
"But Nick, you love it out here. And you love working for you dad." I told him.
"No. I love my job, but I do not love working for my dad. And I love it here, but not without you here with me. I just want to be with you Sammy." He said. He stopped walking, and took my hand, pulling me into him, and hugging me. The side of his face touched mine, and his cheek was wet. I couldn't hold it in anymore, and started to cry.
"People don't always find this. Please don't give it up." He whispered. "We can figure something out." He said.
"Nick. I don't know." I said, and took a deep breath. He hugged me tighter.
"I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do. But I know you want us." He said.
"No." I said, and he let go, and took a step back. I knew as soon as I said it, it was a lie.
"What?" He asked.
"I had to see how I felt if I told you no. But I don't believe myself. I do want this." I told him. He looked confused, and I laughed and wiped my cheek.
"Yeah, I know. It sounds crazy to me too!" I told him. "Come here."
He walked back and hugged me.
"Let me talk to Johnny." I said, and sighed.
"Really?" He asked me.
"Yeah, really. Then you and I can see what we have together." I told him, and he smiled. "Now lets get back to Brit and Ricky." I told him, and started running. He ran after me, Picked me up and threw me over his shoulder.
"Put me down!" I shouted.
"Okay." He said, and dropped me in the sand.
"Ow! Jerk!" I said, and threw sand at him.
"Oh, you get it now!" He shouted, and layed down on me, pinning my arms between our boddies. he started tickling me.
"STOOOOOOOP!" I shouted, laughing.
"I'll stop if you kiss me." He said.
"Okay!" I managed to get out between laughs. He stopped and smiled at me. He let my arms go, and I reached up and pulled his head down and kissed him. It turned into a long kiss. I don't think either one of us wanted to stop. He was the first one to pull away.
"I love you." He whispered. Suddenly very serious.
"I love you too." I told him. He stood up, then helped me up and we walked back to the fire and Brit and Ricky.
We all had so much fun that night! Brit and I vowed to not drift apart this time. It was really late when we all decided to head home. I said good bye to Nick, and then Brit dropped me off at home. She was going to stay over, but changed her mind. She wanted to stay with Ricky instead. I quietly walked inside and up to my room. I turned on my light and jumped. Johnny was asleep in my bed. I changed and then climbed in next to him.
"Johnny." I whispered, and shook him.
"huh?" He asked confused. "Oh. Hey. Where did you go?" He asked.
"Why are you in my bed?" I asked him.
"You said you were going to come see me tonight. I got tired of waiting, and you seemed upset earlier, so I decided to come see you instead. When you weren't here I climbed in bed to wait. I figured you were with your mom or Anna or something." He said, and yawned.
"I wasn't." I told him.
"Where did you go?" He asked.
"I went to see Some old friends. And Nick." I told him. I decided this was the best time to talk to him.
"Oh." He said.
"Johnny, what we have is amazing. But what we have isn't real. I don't think we really have any connection." I told him.
"None?" He asked.
"Well, obviously a slight one. But I know I'm not the only one that feels this way." I told him.
"Don't get me wrong. I like you. I like you a lot. But this isn't working."
He looked mad.
"No, it's not. I guess I just didn't want to admit it." He said. "So, this is the end of our road?" He asked.
"Yeah. You don't hate me do you?" I asked him.
"No. I don't. In fact I'm a little relieved." He said.
"Relieved?" I asked.
"Yeah. I've been talking a lot with Jaime." He said.
"Okay. And?" I asked, when he paused.
"I want to move out here." He said.
"What?" I asked, completely shocked.
"I've hit it off with Jaime real well. He's been wanting to move out of your parents for a while, and we thought it would be great for us to be roomates." He said. "Plus I really want to stay out here and compete in more tournements. I'll get a lot farther, a lot faster out here." He said.
"I think that is a great idea. What about Jaime though? My dad will flip because he thinks he has no direction in his life." I said.
"Stop worrying about your older brother." He said, and emphasized older. "We have some ideas for making money. Your brother has a business mind, though he hides it real well." He said.
"My brother?" I asked.
"Yes, your brother." He told me.
"Well, I think it's great." I said.
"Awesome. I'm also not going to be flying back with you." He said.
"Why not?" I asked, kind of upset.
"Because there is another competition the day we'd have to leave. I'm going to buy a ticket and fly back to New York in a week. I'll bring Jaime with me, so we can all hang out. Then I'm going to pack the few things I have, and fly back out here." He explained.
"Okay. I'll miss having you around." I told him.
"I'll miss you too. Don't be a stranger. We're still friends, aren't we?" He asked.
"Yeah." I said, and smiled. There was an akward pause.
"Well, I'll get to my own bed." He said, and hugged me. I watched him leave, then pulled the covers over me and shut out my light. I cried. I was going to miss Johnny. But only as a friend. I knew that. Then I thought of Nick and felt so happy. I couldn't sleep, so I picked up my phone to call him.
"Hey." He answered.
"Hey." I said. "I talke to Johnny." I told him.
"Did you?" He asked.
"Yeah. It went well." I said.
"I'm glad. So now you single, yes?" He asked.
"Yes, I do believe I am." I told him.
"Well, I'm going to come over and sneak in, like old times. Leave your window unlocked." He said, and hung up. I laughed, and got up and opened my window for him.
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